Fit in your 50s

Those who say they still feel like they’re in their 20s when they’re in their 50s are either smoking some prime time roll mop, cultivating some mind altering tumour or in total denial.  Either way, they should share their crop, ignore that growth or look away very quickly in a crowed elevator when that involuntary fart rips out their soggy colon.

Those in their 20s are invincible hormone pumped up maniacs who can stay up all night, pumping and being pumped.  Those in their 50s can only dream of such times, in the brutal knowledge that youth really is wasted on the young and a dawning realization that the only pumping they would be involved in would be directed on their chest area.

​Those in their 20s can eat as much as they want and move as little as they please and still maintain a level weight.  Those in their 50s need to eat as little as possible and move as much as possible all while their body is screaming, slow down, just get comfortable and fill your face.

​Time to fire up a mop, lease an MRI, break wind and run.